Fun Tip Tuesdays - Man’s Nature: a Woman’s Opportunity
In our quest to keep content interesting and fresh, today is our first guest post ever by Kit, author of Blogging Dangerously. I met Kit (another anonymous blogger) via Twitter a few weeks ago. I loved what she had to say about her marriage, her attitude about intimacy, and how forthcoming and comfortable she is about the whole subject . I asked her to do a Fun Tip Tuesdays post for us based on a hilarious story she wrote about her brief but unrealized stint as an almost-sex-phone-operator. What intrigued me was that the whole experience made her VERY interested in intimacy with her husband - immediately. I asked her to adapt that concept for you – okay, really for me (or, in other words, to vanilla it down). Here’s what she has to say… after reading, check out her blog.
Last week on my blog, Blogging Dangerously, I wrote about ‘Married Sex.’ (And by wrote about, I mean ABOUT – enter at your own risk.) I had a great time sharing some hilarious stories and my readers responded by sharing their own.
In addition, one of my readers left the following comment: “The males of any species are undeterred, no matter what the consequences, if the possibility of sex is an option. I’m not saying this is similar to the sexual dynamic in my house, but I’m not saying it isn’t either.” Of course this was written in jest and is also terribly stereotypical. Regardless I’ve found it to be true, at least with my husband, past boyfriends and any male friends who felt they could be honest with me. Sometimes this can be overwhelming, particularly when you’re not feeling particularly amorous. But when you are, why not use it to your advantage?
I received a lot of comments last week from people thanking me for reminding them that ‘married sex’ exists, is neither a myth nor an oxymoron and ALSO, can be VERY FUN. If you’re interested in making a pass at your significant other, try sexting him (sending him racy text messages,) leaving him a racy voicemail (just be sure you tell him not to listen to it on speakerphone,) or just calling him and saying, “I’m thinking about you. And I’m naked.” If you decide to go this route you can read more about sexy texting here. If you’d like something a little less NAKED, then these would both work: “I’m thinking about the last time we were together.” or “I was just thinking about how much I love you and thought that maybe tonight, I could show you.”
If sexting is a little too high tech or coming out and saying it is a little too forward for you, here’s another option that will get your point across without technology and without hitting him over the head with it. Walk up to your spouse and lead him to a chair. Sit him down. Hug him. Kiss him. An old boyfriend once told me, “I like what you like.” So be affectionate. You dont have to attack him. I like to kiss my husband beside his right eye as gently as I can. A gentle touch is a gentle reminder of what can happen between the two of you. Trust me. He’s a guy. He’ll get it.
Love,
Kit
See what I mean? She is a wonderfully descriptive writer, a real dynamo. She is someone incredibly confident in her own abilities to charm and please her husband, and she isn’t afraid of it. To the contrary, she embraces it. It’s an adventure for her, and they both benefit.
Friends, if you haven’t already, it’s time to try some of these charms, don’t you think? And if you have any other ideas, post them below.
Other Posts You May Enjoy
Does Size Matter (yes, THAT size)
8 Ways to Treat Your Husband Like A Boyfriend
Don’t want to miss a thing? Anonymous8 delivers! Click here for your options (they are free, of course).
Beautiful. It’s important to remember that’s it not just about “spicing things up” all of the time. I mean, I’m all about blindfolds and sexy games and all that, but it’s the pointed glance and the soft whisper that can really get both people going.
Not that it’s not fun to toss your panties in his lap and walk into the bedroom!
I love Kit’s blog! I also found her via twitter as well as you anonymous8. Great post. It is important to show your hubby you’re still into him with little hints and gestures and really it doesn’t take much. They want it every chance they can get. Now what to say when you’re not in the mood…hmmm.
Ashley, last week’s giveaway asked that question. That is a key question, isn’t it? Here’s the link…
http://anonymous8.com/giveaways/50-date-night-giveaway/
Sarah
I could write a lot but I will try to be brief…
For many reasons, my libido is zooming even though I’m 48 and have been married 28 years. Part of it was learning to disconnect my so-called emotional needs from being amorous. I personally think women put too much into needing to feel “connected” with their husband’s before they can be in the mood. JMO.
My husband and I have made a practice of sending racy e-mails and texts in the last year or so. It’s really not that difficult and no one else is going to read them!
The most difficult part of married sex, for us, is making the time. We have four kids ages 25 to 8 and they all still live at home. Between my husband’s contracting business, home-schooling, and my going to college part-time (along with all the other complications of life) it can be difficult to “fit it in.” (No pun intended, but that’s good don’t you think
Still…you just gotta do it. Whether it’s a quickie, or a leisurely excursion, just do it. And as they say, the more you have the more you want…
Anny,
This is a great comment! I think there is something to your libido zooming at 48, by the way. More on that later!
Sarah
Great thoughts from Kit and great responses. You have really got it going on.